Valerie is a 42-year-old, single, Reformed Christian lady who lives in Baltimore. She doesn't remember a time
before she knew and loved Jesus, but she does remember accepting John Calvin into her heart in March of 2000.
Valerie is a member of Christ Reformed Evangelical Church in Annapolis.
Though her career aspiration is to be a housewife, Valerie has not yet found anyone suitable who wishes to hire
her for employment in that field (or, more properly, anyone suitable has not found her), so in the meantime she
earns her daily bread working in communications -- editing, writing, print design and website management.
E-Mail Balm from a Friend
I e-mailed a friend earlier today, and asked her, "I haven't the fist clue how to do grief. I'm just sort of feeling bewildered and alone. Is that what it's supposed to feel like?" Her response is what I needed to hear, especially the sentence I bolded:
Now I know why you have been on my mind so much. ... R--- said there was a death in your family. I am so sorry. This is hard, especially coming on the heels of your family friend. You know, Valerie, there is not a right way to grieve. Or a wrong way for that matter. It looks and feels different for everyone and it feels different from one experience to another. Sometimes the experiences build on one another and sometimes they are rolled up with the struggles we have in our everyday lives and we are just permeated with sadness. Death does not please God and He grieves along with us. That is my comfort. I know that in my sadness God desires and is pleased to comfort me. You know, "Jesus wept". What an incredible thing. He really understands the pain of loss and how we feel in the depths of our soul the finality of death. Don't try to second guess yourself during the process. Just cry and feel the way you feel. Be sad. It is o.k.
